Inspired (finally!)

Ah, the muse is back. The fog has lifted. The juices are flowing. Insert whatever mixed metaphor here that works for saying I feel like my old creative self again. My son is almost eight months old, and on a great sleep schedule, and suddenly my brain is functioning again. For awhile there it was touch and go; there was a period when the Twilight series was the only thing that I read, and any writing consisted of notes scribbled down about how often said son was napping and pooping. At last, I am beyond that newborn haze, and my mind has a few brain cells that can be occupied with creative things.

At first, when my wits returned to me, I didn’t know what to do with them. I could look around and see with new clarity that a few things had been neglected in their absence – my household, my husband, and my wardrobe, to name a few. But I’d also been forgetting to feed my soul, which leads to despair for me and renders me incapable of taking care of those other aspects of my life. To regain my creativity, I needed to “fill the well”, to borrow a concept from Julia Cameron’s, The Artist Way. I needed to do things that sparked interest in life, that got my ideas churning again, that made me feel engaged and present, instead of merely getting through the days and craving escape to vampire land (or werewolf-ville, since I am for Team Jacob).

Here are some ways my well is filled:

  • Listening to stories: The Moth, NPR and PRI have some of the best- Great stories get me going, mostly about people who are pursuing their passions, but really learning anything new can get me high on ideas right now. Here are some that excited me recently: Bootlegger Blues: L.Gabrielle Penebaz’ obsession with trying absinthe turns into a serious creative pursuit (anything can be your art!).   Change Over Time – Carl Honore talks about the Slow Movement (I will blog later about how this got me interested in “slow parenting” and “slow travel”) and Amy Gorman decides to interview older women artists to see how they keep at it. Very inspiring! (Makes me want to go get the book she wrote about it.)
  • Looking for role models – If I just bumbled through life with what I know and what I learned from my parents or my limited experiences, I wouldn’t have much to work with. It’s hard to create in a vacuum, to make something from not very much, so by looking around and seeing how others are fashioning interesting lives for themselves, I get ideas for how to dream bigger in my own. The documentary Who Does She Think She Is? is a recent example of this, my new heroes being those women who pursue their artistic life while also choosing motherhood. It helps me be more creative about how I spend my days to ask myself “who do I want to be like?” and “how do I start taking steps to become more like that now?”.
  • Reading – Just finished Nurture Shock: New Thinking about Children by Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman. Very interesting studies, deserving of its own post later.
  • Planning things to look forward to – It’s easy to get into a rut of just going through the motions one day after another while childrearing. It can feel like Groundhog Day. But we’ve just planned a three-week trip to Taiwan in April, and the anticipation has been a tremendous boon to my energy level.

It really is amazing how different life feels with a little sleep and some inspiration. By taking care of my own spirit’s needs, I have so much more to give to my family. And maybe that will even trickle down to this blog. I might actually have some interesting things to share with you soon!


Walking Dogs Is No Cakewalk

Imagine a car that has been driven for nearly six years by a dogwalker in San Francisco. With over 100,000 hard city miles put on it, the bumpers are dinged, the hubcaps are scratched and the brakes and tires have had to be replaced far more often than any normal vehicle would need in that time. But it’s the interior that I want you to focus on. Picture crusted drool along the tops of the windows, matted hair gathered in every nook and cranny, upholstery that has been soaked in all manner of bodily fluids – vomit, urine, feces, saliva, and worst of all, a little-known liquid I like to call “butt juice”(I’ve only met other animal care professionals who know about anal glands and the pungent horror they secrete, but every potential dog owner should be forewarned. If the power of this stuff could be harnessed we would have an incredible new weapon in biochemical warfare). And this is after weekly car washes, interior and exterior; they groan when they see me pull up at Auto City.

And that’s not even a rainy week. Conjure up for a moment the smell of wet dogs on top of all that, and their musty breath fogging up the windows. Envision the towels used to dry off the water-logged pooches lying in a soggy, muddy mess on the floor. I don’t ask you to visualize this so you pity me the hardships of dogwalking in the winter, only so you understand that my job is not just a walk in the park, as articles like this one Josie Holtzman wrote for NPR’s All Things Considered might have you believe, as if dogwalkers were frolicking in the great outdoors making money hand over fist while the rest of America suffers. My job is not for everyone, so don’t go quitting your desk job or getting too jealous next time you see one of us out and about.

Yes, we make decent money. I made more my first year picking up poop than I made during my fifth (and last) year changing the lives of society’s youth as a high school art teacher. I initially only intended to take a break from teaching to have some time to create my own art, but haven’t gone back because I enjoy it and the money and hours are good. But dollars aren’t everything. As small business owners, dogwalkers do not get benefits, retirement, paid vacation, or a vacation at all unless you work really hard to plan for one (man, I miss those summers off).  And recession-proof it is not. Many of my clients lost their jobs or had to cut back over the last two years. Even in non-recession years, your monthly income is not guaranteed. People cancel last minute, they take their dog to Tahoe for the summer, they move away, etc. The city is a transient place and the turnover can be high. Dogwalkers have to hustle to keep work steady just like any other self-employed business owner.

The article does mention the physical toll and the logistics of walking dogs in New York. In San Francisco it’s just as physically taxing and we have the same logistical challenge of keeping all the keys straight, but it is a little different in that most of us don’t walk from apartment building to building picking up dogs, we drive. A lot. In my busiest year, I was driving about 50 miles a day, feeling an awful lot like a cab driver. We are lucky that this city has many parks and beaches we can drive to and then let the dogs run off-leash. But this brings us to politics. We may not have “office” politics, but the park scene can be downright contentious. Paranoid parents, nature lovers, and park police all have issues with dogwalkers. Some for good reason; there isn’t much on the books to regulate the dogwalking profession, so you get some opportunistic hacks after those six-figure incomes the article mentions who load up fifteen dogs and set them loose in a park to defecate wherever and do what they will for a few minutes, load ’em up and do it all over again three or four times a day. Doesn’t make for a pleasant park experience for anyone else around. But for those trying to do a good job, keeping things clean and everybody safe, getting an earful from an irate birdwatcher gets old.

You do have to be good with both dogs and people. As wonderful as dogs are, they are unpredictable animals, and their owners can be, too. I am fortunate to have been doing this long enough that I can be particular about which clients I take on. I have weeded out the persnickety, inconsiderate owners (like the ones who made sure I brought their dog back spotless, but would regularly forget to leave my pay) and the crazy dogs (like the German Shepherd who bit me because I approached her frisbee too quickly), but I racked up a book’s worth of stories about them I intend to write someday.

You also have to be good at business – keeping organized records and invoicing and discussing money on a regular basis. And you have to be good at being alone. You do not have the comradery of co-workers. Your non-dog interaction is limited to your stay-at-home mom clients and the other dogwalkers shepherding their packs around the parks. Somehow you have to cope with the monotony while staying completely on top of the necessary systems to keep track of keys, dogs, who pooped, which house you’re going to next, etc. You fight boredom while preparing for potential chaos or crisis at all times. All for very little prestige. Most people look at you like you flip burgers when you say you walk dogs for a living. Unless they’ve read similar articles to the NPR one and then they’re just curious about how much money you make. I certainly got more respect as a teacher. I recently ran into my ditzy second grade teacher (I remember I used to correct her spelling), and she gave me a condescending “Oh, that’s ok”, when I told her what I was up to.

Most people get into this not for the quick bucks or any glory, but because they love dogs. And you have to in order to put up with all I’ve mentioned. But even that love for dogs makes it tough. Besides the possibility of them moving on from this impermanent town, once you get attached, there’s the inevitable end if you do this job long enough. Almost six years in, and the dogs I started with as puppies are now middle-aged. They’re getting lumpy and slow and I’ve had to have many end-of-life-care discussions with clients whose dogs weren’t puppies when I started. I’ve had to say goodbye to many a best friend, and it breaks my heart every time.

Again, I’m not writing this for any “woe is me” reasons, just to point out the particular tribulations of a job that on the surface looks like a lot of money for a lot of fun. If I deter some of those who don’t really care about dogs from entering the field, great. If you are still interested in the gig after reading this, you may have what it takes to be a great dogwalker. I’d just encourage you to get a good whiff of a dogwalker’s car before you commit.